Cleaning Closets

My sister gave me this great idea for cleaning out the clothes in my closet. We always hear if you haven't worn something in a year, get rid of it, right? Well, I can't remember what I've worn in the last year.

So she suggested turning all my clothes hangers backwards so that the hook opens toward me. Every time I wear something, I put it back in with the hanger the right way. At the end of six months I can decide whether to keep or donate the clothes that I haven't worn simply by finding the backwards hangers.

I started in March so I'm anxiously looking forward to September! I'm such a 'what if' girl that I have a hard time getting rid of clothes. This way I'll know I went the whole summer without wearing something and it will be a definite give away!

Monday's Motto

If you're going to do something, do your very best.

School Starts Soon

We're gearing up for school to start in a little over a week. I like to start early because I like to finish early (first week of May). I've thoroughly enjoyed the summer because I've been able to get a lot of projects done that I am just not motivated to do after schooling in the mornings during the school year. I'm a morning person, so most of my energy and ambition start early and wane as the day goes on.

As much as I've loved the ease of the summer break, I am also really looking forward to school again. I love the routine. I love teaching them (most of the time). I love that, Lord willing, Charlie will learn to read this year. And maybe Iris. I'm going to have her sit with us during his lessons.

I love that I have the freedom to have them home with me. That I don't have to send them off for someone else - who can't possibly love them as much as I do - influence them 8 hours a day.

I love that I don't have to be away from them all day and when they do come home have to fight the battle of untraining all the junk they pick up when they're around other kids hour after hour, day after day.

I love that because I get to spend so much time with them, I get to know them better than anyone else. I don't need someone else to tell me what they're good at or what they are struggling with in school. When they excel, I get to let them soar rather than holding them back with a room full of other kids. And when they struggle, I get to give them the one-on-one attention they need. They don't have to get by because the rest of the class needs to move on.

I love that I get to talk about God all day. That I get to tell them how He is in everything they learn. That He created everything they learn.

I love that I get to socialize them. I think it's funny that the number one question/argument against homeschooling is socialization but in school kids are segregated by age and subjected to bullying and teasing and peer pressure. I'll take teaching my kids how to love God and love others at home with siblings and friends and cousins and grandparents and nursing home residents of all ages over that any day!

Is homeschooling always easy? Absolutely NOT!

Is it worth the sacrifice of "me-time" and projects done to invest my life in theirs? ABSOLUTELY YES!

My kids were jump-roping to the Cinderella Dressed in Yellow song. Since I didn't like the part about going upstairs to kiss the fellow, we changed it up a little. Here's our new wording:

Cinderella dressed in yellow
Went upstairs to eat some jello.
Made a mistake and ate some cake.
How many pieces did she take?

Monday's Motto

I thought it would be fun if each Monday we shared our family or personal mottos. For example,

If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

{Obviously proper grammar is not necessary.}

Most of our mottos are ones we've stolen, I mean adopted, from others.

This next one Mr. Bradley taught us:

Work hard,

Work fast,

Don't stop,

Look for more.

What is a motto you want to share this Monday?

Not Yet

No, I'm not pregnant yet.

I've been asked quite a few times in the last week if I'm pregnant. I thought since I put you through all of this, I should at least update you on our progress.

The first month was the worst. To say I was obsessed would be putting it mildly. With every twinge and pain I had thoughts like, I must be pregnant. That must be implanting. My uterus must be growing already!

I didn't even wait to see if my period was going to start. I took one test several days early - hey, it said EARLY detection. I asked Roddy to hide the other one so I couldn't find it. Then I talked him into giving it to me the night before my period.

All I had to do was wait 8 hours and I would have known! Now I've asked him not to even buy me a test until I miss my period.

The last two months have been much better. I assume I'm not pregnant - or atleast try to tell myself that - so I won't be disappointed. Okay so I will be disappointed but let's face it, for someone who has never had a hard time getting pregnant, this has been a change.

But I know it's all about trusting God and letting go of my death grip on the control I want to have.

Good learning experience, right?!

I'll keep you posted...

PC, Specks, and Logs

Here are my ponderings about my last post:

I was thinking about why we don't automatically talk to someone ~ especially believers ~ about using God's name in vain. And I was thinking that in reality we don't reprove anyone for anything anymore.

Galatians 6:1 says,

Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression,

you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness.

Maybe we don't consider ourselves spiritual. We start thinking about Matthew 7:3-7:

Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?
Or how can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when there is the log in your own eye?

You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.

And instead of doing something about our log we just ignore it along with the speck in our brother's/sister's eye. Then no one is better off.

Maybe we don't reprove each other because we don't want to hear it ourselves. We don't like to be corrected and told when we're doing something wrong. I mean, really, who enjoys that? I don't. But Proverbs 15:31-33 says,

The ear that listens to life-giving reproof will dwell among the wise.

Whoever ignores instruction despises himself, but he who listens to reproof gains intelligence.

The fear of the LORD is instruction in wisdom, and humility comes before honor.

Maybe we just don't want to offend anyone. We live in a world overrun with political correctness. We're considered narrow-minded if we believe so strongly about something that we would actually impose that belief on someone else. Is it possible that we've come to believe that it is wrong to offend someone by speaking the truth of God's Word - even to believers?

Galatians talks about pleasing God rather than man. Who are we pleasing?

And in all honesty, there are times I'm asked directly for my advice about parenting and shy away from telling someone what I really think. While I have no problem telling you what to do in specific situations, if you ask me what I think about your parenting or kids I have a hard time spilling it. I don't want to offend.

So what are we to do?

1. Exam our own lives on a daily basis. Ask God to reveal the logs in our own eyes.

2. When it is necessary to speak to someone we should always consider our timing and motives.

3. Speak the truth in love.

Hallowed Be Thy Name

Got a question for you. I was prompted to ask based on this post.

First, do you use the Lord's name in vain? Do you say, "Oh my ~~~!" (I can't even type it.) If so, why?

Once when I was very young I heard some friends use the expression. So like most kids, I tried it out too. My dad was careful to correct me and said we shouldn't even say gosh. I took it to heart. So much so that I would rarely even say God in respectful conversation about Him.

Third Commandment:

"You shall not take the name of the LORD your God in vain,

for the LORD will not hold him guiltless who takes his name in vain."

Second, should we say something to those who use His name in vain? If so, what?

Should we say anything to unbelievers?

I would love to have a Christ-like, God-honoring response especially to believers. So think about it and let me know what you think. Thanks!!

Bible-Time

After reading this post, Mrs. Schultz asked, "...do they do independent Bible reading or is that as a family/ or both?"

Answer: The kids who can read have their own Bible-time as part of their morning "chores". I use the term chore loosely because I don't consider Bible reading a chore. During their time, they pick what they want to read. When they come and ask me if they are free I usually ask them what they read and what they think it means. Sometimes I give a quick explanation if I think they need help understanding it. I have really enjoyed these quick wisdom lessons I get to have with them.

I don't place any expectations on their time. Sometimes they will only read one verse. I'm okay with that. This is their time. Sometimes all God wants is for us to focus on one verse. Other times, they may pick a whole chapter. I don't want someone dictating my time with the Lord so I don't dictate theirs.

After morning chores we all gather - even the little ones (who aren't so little anymore) - for Bible-time that I lead. Usually we sit on the floor in my room since that is where we keep the Bibles and the books that we use during our time. Everyone has a Bible to look up the verse or verses we'll read.

During this time we review the books of the Bible and/or the verses we're memorizing together. Then we either read from one of our Bible-time books, looking up Scripture to go with it, or I pick a topic that I think needs to be discussed and we look up scripture to go along with that.

Of course, I always end our time in prayer. I encourage each child to pray but don't force it. Then I pray last.


Books I use? Hands down, my all-time favorite is Wisdom and the Millers, although I love the whole Miller Family Series of books. We call it Miller Time! Hee hee!

Also, The Original 21 Rules of This House and Our 24 Family Ways are great.

Sometimes I'll read The Squire and The Scroll as we talk about guarding our hearts by guarding our eyes, ears and mouths.

If you aren't starting your day in the Word you're missing out. There is a noticeable difference when I think I can just skip it for the day because other matters seem more pressing.

If you homeschool, this should be your first "class." Someone said, "Well, we do devotions together as a family at night (when the husband is home)." Great! But you also need to start your day with the Word.

If your kids go to school, take time during breakfast. I have a friend who is adamant about getting up in time to have devotions with her kids before school. It can be done. It just needs to be a priority.

You will see the benefits!

"Stinking Thinking"

"Anxiety attacks, depression, somber moods, feelings of not being in control of your mind, unfounded fears, and bursts of anger all start in the mind. They are what you have allowed yourself to become through your 40,000 daily thoughts. By reacting the same way repeatedly, you establish habits that become so much a part of you that they may seem to be organic--a part of your physical make-up.

Stinking thinking is an addiction that will grow into such a habit that it controls the body and deceives the mind." ~Debi Pearl

When I read this I was struck. I don't know how many times I have read or heard:

~as a man/woman thinks so is he/she.

~out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks.

I know that the way I think is how I will act. But I interpreted this concept as whatever I think or believe about something, is how I will act, rather than the individual thoughts that pop into my head throughout the day determining how I will act or react.

Let me give you an example. I think/believe that we should be patient with our children. I believe taking the time to train them should be a top priority.

Yesterday, Iris did something that needed correction. The thought that immediately ran through my head was I don't have time for this. Well if that is my thought, that I don't have time for this, I am going to either act frustrated that I have to deal with it or I'm going to battle my own flesh to maintain patient composure to deal with it.

Because I had just read the quote above, I immediately realized my wrong thought and corrected myself with Yes, you do have time for this! This is all you have time for right now.

It was much easier to focus on lovingly training my daughter when my thinking was right. Otherwise, I would have corrected her as quickly as possible and moved on - back to what I wanted to be doing.

...and take every thought captive to obey Christ...

II Corinthians 10:5b

Grab those sinful, selfish thoughts as soon as they pop into your mind. Throw them out and replace them with God-pleasing thoughts. Replace the habit of negative thinking with a habit of godly thinking that will change your life.

Blessings for Blessings

Luke 6:38 Jesus said,

"Give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you."

I almost cried when we got the mail yesterday. Emma received a package and Jay an envelope. When they were opened they revealed blessings for their blessings.

Some one of you sweet people blessed Emma with a brand new, never before opened Bible. Just like the one she worked so hard for and gave away.

And Jay's wallet is full again with money (more than he gave) that was wrapped in a sweet note which read,

"Jackson, God bless you for helping the children of Haiti." and was signed, "A friend of God's."

Makes me want to cry again. Truly you are a friend of God's!

Thank you!

Hand-Me-Downs

Gotta love 'em!

One of my summer projects was to go through all the hand-me-down clothes and shoes that I've gotten from my sister for Iris and from a friend for Emma. Both love to shop and have great taste. So I have a ton of clothes for the girls. In fact, I really don't ever have to buy them anything!

I also had some clothes and shoes from my sisters-in-law for the boys and Emma.

This is a picture of almost 200 pairs of shoes (this does not include the shoes in their closets that they currently wear!)This is the pile of clothes we are giving away! The guest closet is full of totes with clothes waiting to be worn.

Blessing for a Curse

When your children have conflict with other children (friends, cousins) how do you advise them?

Do you run to the other mom? Do you bad mouth the offender? Or the offender's parents for poor parenting skills? Do you advise them to just stay away and not play with that child?

Maybe you automatically assume it's your child's fault?

Non of these are good practices according to Jesus and His example to us.

In Luke, Jesus tells us...

"Love your enemies,

do good to those who hate you,

bless those who curse you,

pray for those who abuse you.

To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also,

and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either."

Paul also says...

"Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them."

Live is not fair. People are not always kind.

Children learn this early. How will you teach them to deal with unkind, unfair people?

Jesus gave us an example....

"When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate;

when he suffered, he made no threats.

Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly."

What is our example to our children when others are unkind to us? Cut us off in traffic or the grocery line? Church isn't what we think it should be (I'm talking preferences not theology)? Friends don't live up to our expectations?

Something to consider when offended:

Check the beam in your own eye before you worry about the speck in another's.

Pray for them. And I don't mean for God to change them. Pray for yourself - for God's love to be manifested in you.

Forgive as Christ forgave you.

Bless them.

Teach your children to do the same.

The Bestest Gift Ever!

Tonight Roddy gave Jackson an indoor basketball hoop.

He was so excited. He said, "This is the second bestest present I've ever gotten."

I said, "Really!? What's the first?"

And then with a tone that conveyed what a silly question that was, he respectfully said, "Jesus!"

I said, "That is so sweet!"

Then he laughed and said, "Why didn't you think of that?"

I said, "I don't know what I was thinking."

Love that kid!

Recommended Reading

Whenever we teach a parenting class at church we lug lots and lots of books for parents to consider reading. I have been saying I'm going to compile a list so they don't have to write them all down. Finally I have done it.

You can check out the list here.

Praising God for Great Neighbors!

I was working on the "other wall" of the office and wanted to get some things thrown out in the big trashcan before it started raining. As I walked to the edge of the driveway, I noticed Mario (Tina's husband) and their friend holding on to our trampoline. It had blown into the neighbor's house to the right of us.

I had no clue!

So I run to help and then the neighbor to the left of us comes running out to help too! He goes back in while we try to figure how to position this thing from flying away again. After we moved it to the other side of the wooden swingset out comes Mr. Booth again with heavy weights to hold it down!

I felt so loved to have all them helping me out.

Then, of course, Tina and Emma ran out to help me get the chickens in their crate to put in the garage.

Thank you, God, for GREAT neighbors!

Two Stories of Giving Hearts...

aka Proud Mama Bragging...

HIS STORY

This week at VBS the kids are bringing money to help children in Haiti. To make it more exciting and inviting the leaders make it a competition between the boys and the girls. The girls won Monday and Tuesday and Wednesday.

Yesterday morning as Emma came into the bathroom she told me Jay was going to bring $28 (all the money he has) to VBS. He had said this the day before but didn't mention it again.

So I went into the office to make sure that he was giving the money for the right reasons. I said, "Jay, are you giving your money today so the boys will win?"

Without a second thought he sincerely said, "No, it's for the kids in Haiti."

So off he went with a pocketful of birthday and allowance money. I told him how special it was that he would give so much and how proud I was of him for helping other kids.

~~~~
~~~~

HER STORY

For 13 or 14 weeks the children's ministry put an emphasis on the kids having personal devotions every day. Each week they gave a tri-fold devotion guide called Treasure Quest, made up by one of the children's leaders, for the kids to follow each day of the week. It was so great for the kids to have this simple guide that they could follow themselves.

Of course, as an incentive there would be prizes at the end of the 13-14 weeks depending on the points earned for devotions completed, verses memorized, bonus questions answered, etc.

Emma had a goal! The highest level of points won a brand new Bible. She has had her Bible for almost 4 years and it is falling apart.

When the awards Sunday finally came (May 24) Emma was one of only a few (out of a couple hundred or more kids) that made it to the top level. She was so excited. She received a t-shirt, pencil, private party at Monkey Joe's with other level winners, and of course her new Bible!

Fast forward to last Saturday. Tina (who lives a couple houses over behind us) was babysitting another friend's daughter, Dominique, for a few days. Her kids and Dominique had come over to play. Emma had never met her before but at some point during their time together she goes upstairs, brings down her NEW Bible and gives it to this girl!! She said she didn't think the girl had a Bible so she gave her hers!

When she told me later that night I hugged her so tight and kissed and kissed her sweet little head!

I told both she and Jackson that they had special rewards in heaven for their sacrificial giving!

The Wagner Library

A year ago, Roddy said I could splurge and reorganize/decorate our office-school-craft room. I bought the paint I wanted then called in the expert, my friend Tiff, to get her opinion on fabric for the curtains and pillows.

We painted. Roddy put up floor-to-ceiling, wall-to-door shelves. I organized the office-school (curriculum)-craft supplies in these perfect sized tubs from Walmart. {They are much cheaper than baskets at $1.88 and in my opinion more durable. And since the shelves were going to be covered with curtains it didn't matter how pretty they were.}
I recovered a bunch of old pillows for a reading area and got the shelf curtains and one window curtain sewn then pretty much stalled. I don't know if school started or what but I made no progress after that.

But, summer is here again! And I am so excited about everything I've been able to accomplish in this room. Mom came over last week and we added a topper to the boring window curtain I had sewn last year. Then made a cute little window treatment for our tiny window AND made a table cover to cover the ugly gray folding table!

Also, Saturday when I got back from an all-day Bible study, Roddy surprised me with 2 new 6-shelf book cases!! I had a ton of new books that I bought at the used curriculum sale and was trying to figure out how to make them fit. Now they are oh so organized.

The first 2-shelf bookcase is for science magazines and books (non-curriculum). The second 2-shelf bookcase is for history. There are biography books and autobiographies, history readers and historical fiction.

On the first 6-shelf bookcase (top to bottom) are old readers that I've collected; classics like The Wind in the Willows, Little Men, etc.; and then books that are a series like Little House, Boxcar Children, etc.

The next big bookcase has more of my old book collection; big kid readers; Bible and character/virtue books; and little kid readers.

Here are the before and after pictures:

the view from the door...
the view from the window...the view of the wall before shelving and curtains...I still have this wall to work on. It's on the list! Otherwise, the Wagner Library is open for business!

Poor Jay

Last night after the boys took their baths they were horsin' around in their room. Gray grabbed a pillow sham and whacked Jay on top of his head. I heard crying but it didn't sound like anything worse than usual. So I waited for the offended and offender to come to me.

Next thing I hear is a terrified scream from Gray calling for me. Jay was bleeding profusely from his head. There was so much blood we couldn't figure out exactly where the wound was or how bad it was. What Gray didn't know was that there was a toy car hidden in the sham.

I grabbed some toilet paper from a roll that just happened to be on Charlie's dresser and applied pressure. Roddy ran to get a bunch of rags and when the toilet paper was full I switched. We told everyone to get dressed so we could go to the emergency room.

Roddy decided to call our sweet friend Tina (who also bailed me out yesterday morning) to stay with everyone else so they didn't have to go. She came over immediately.

By the time we made it downstairs, the blood had stopped pouring out. After a little ice we rinsed his hair out in the sink and decided he wouldn't need stitches. Dr. Daddy wrapped his head for the night to protect it while he slept. And of course, he got to sleep in our bed!

Being Accountable

When you get angry with your children and yell at them, do you feel like the worst mom ever?

Do you feel like you don't know why God gave you children because you don't deserve them?

I do. I also wonder why I want more because I don't deserve the ones I have.

I threw a fit this morning with my oldest son. A fit is putting it mildly and really not accurate. I was angry and fed up and I was going to make sure he knew it.

Why was I angry? Because I'm selfish and want things done my way. Because my focus was not on training my son, it was on controlling him.

I sent Emma and Jay with my friend to VBS and the rest of us stayed home even though I was committed to helping out. I didn't want to go and put on a smile and pretend everything was hunky-dory. I also didn't want to go and complain about what had happened.

I don't know about you, but when I act so unkind to my children, I completely forget all the good things I've ever done. This morning even as I was thinking about how I would encourage another mom in the same situation, I talked myself out of being comforted because I just didn't feel deserving.

Then I thought about the people who think I have it altogether and what a hypocrite I am. I don't yell at my kids when other people are around. My self-control is amazing when I have others around. And I'm not saying I yell at my kids every day, all day. But I have yelled at them and used harsh tones and even doing that once is a sin and poor example to them.

What is my point? First, that I want to be real. I don't want to appear to have it all together. And second, that if you ever feel like the only one who messes up as a mom, you are not alone!

I always tell my kids if they mess up, confess it, ask forgiveness and figure out what you can learn from your mistake so you don't do it again.

So what am I going to do next time I feel anger creeping in? What I should do is run to Jesus! James 4:7 says I should submit myself to God and resist the devil so he will flee from me.

I have to check my focus. Ask myself what my motive is. Am I training in love or controlling in selfishness? Am I pleasing God or myself? Am I building up or tearing down?

James also tells us that anger does not produce the righteous life that God desires. If I don't correct, discipline or train my children in love but use anger, the only thing I'm accomplishing is passing on that anger to my children. And I sure don't want to do that.

I want to be accountable. Feel free to email or call me and ask me how I'm doing. Feel free to ask me how I'm doing in the selfishness department. Or in the controlling instead of training department. Or in pleasing God instead of myself.

I called my mom a little later and she encouraged me and reminded me in so many words that today was an exception rather than a rule. My mom's my cheerleader! Thanks for today, Mom. I love you!